The secret to happiness

My wife: the best in the world

Ladies, I don't mean to put you down. Gentlemen, I don't want to make you envious. But: “Thank you, God, for giving me the best wife in the world.”

Many men might think their wives are the best. They are mistaken. My wife does it all. She is the beautiful, smart-as-a-whip CEO of the Brooks household. She is a self-taught gourmet chef (just ask my poor former co-workers, who had to endure the tantalizing smells of her dishes emanating from the office microwave while munching on fast food), a fastidious housekeeper, a mathematical whiz and precise bookkeeper. She pays all the bills, does all the shopping. All I have to do is give her my paycheck and relax.

She loves to shop, but she is very frugal. She can shop for hours without spending a dime. She knows the price of everything. She is always on the prowl for bargains, and never buys anything that is not on sale. A typical purchase for her is a $28 shirt for $1.98. When in the grocery store loading the basket, she keeps a running tab in her head. At checkout, she can tell you within a few pennies what the total will be. More often than not, she has to correct checkout clerks.

She has an amazing memory and a facility for handling details. Here's just one example: While she was on a trip home to Indonesia to visit her mother, brothers and sisters, I phoned and asked her a question about the household finances. She reminded me of a phone call I forgot to make. Here she was, on the other side of the world, worrying about her sick mother - and she knew more about what was going on in our household than I did. Well, as my teasing son said, “Maybe that's more a function of your own absent-mindedness.”

My son blames me for making it hard for him and his brother to find mates. They keep looking for wives comparable to mine, and of course, there aren't any.

She is always thinking about taking care of us.

My wife goes to visit her family in Indonesia periodically, and she always cooks a freezer full of food for me before she goes. I can tell it's time for her to return home when the freezer starts getting empty. It is not unusual for me to open the last dish on the day I go to the airport to pick her up.

Packing for a trip to the other side of the world is a large undertaking, but she has become proficient at it. Of course she always finds the best airfares beforehand. On one occasion that was more hectic than others, she completed her packing, and knowing that I was going to to visit my parents the following weekend, she found time to pack my bag.

Once we took a cruise to Mexico. For weeks before the cruise, I kept reminding myself to get my passport from the desk drawer when the time came. Driving up to the cruise ship dock in New Orleans, I suddenly had a sinking feeling, but it lasted only briefly. “I bet you remembered to pack my passport,” I told my wife, confident of her answer. “Yes,” she said, with a wry smile, “I was wondering when you would think of it.” I'm lucky. I was smart one time in my life -- when I married my wife. Now I don't have to be smart any more. I can just put my brain on cruise control.

She is a wonderful mother. She raised two fine young men. She still worries about them, although both are now grown, and sees to their every need. After her father died, her mother stayed with us for three years. Lie Shia cared for her every minute of the day. Lie Shia is the glue that keeps our household together. She excels in every aspect of daughterhood, motherhood and wifedom. When she was a little girl playing with her friends, they all talked about their various dreams and career ambitions. Lie Shia's greatest desire was to be a homemaker. You think her dream was too small? I disagree: Our cohesiveness and well-being as a nation depends on homemakers like her. To say she succeeded in fulfilling her dream is like saying Babe Ruth was a pretty fair baseball player.

OK guys, I'll let you in on a secret: Do you want to have the best wife in the world? Tell her she is. Do you want to be crazy, mushy in love with your wife? Tell her you are. Often. You still won't have the best wife in the world, because – you know -- I do. But at least you will convince yourself, and her, and that's all it takes to make you happy.

By the way -- this works for wives, too.